“Maya”
Maya and Jai were college sweetheart in ’93. They met through a mutual friend and connected with one another through patterns of eye contact. Maya, a biology major and Jai a liberal arts major, Maya, the religious one, and Jai, the Atheist one, Maya, the quiet one, Jai the reckless one. The two complete opposites yet both struck helplessly by cupid’s arrows. In their junior year, Jai began to show interest in the Army. He often binged watched boot camp training videos for hours, one time, almost forgetting their two-year anniversary. He expressed his passion for joining the military to Maya countless times. He memorized almost all of the U.S. military slogans, bought army merchandises, and volunteered at the annual Memorial Day parade. One night, they went out to star gaze. Laying down on the cool, dewy grass, they giggled and pointed at the specks in the sky.
“Looking at these gazillion stars with a cutie next to me feels so right” said Jai with a smirk on his face.
“I feel the same way,” chuckled Maya.
“You know something Maya, looking at these stars reminds me that I can achieve my dream to be in the military. People wish that they could be just like one of these stars, all high and shining in front of the whole world and not everyone can be like that. Everything I’m doing right now, being active in my career will pay off.”
Maya turned to him and saw the stars reflected in his dark chocolate, brown eyes and said, “I’m sure someday it will, Jai.”
However, their relationship wasn’t perfect. They would go for days without talking to each other, fighting over his daily drinking and smoking habits especially that one time when he received a $2,000 fine for DUI the second time in a month! Cursing and yelling at first then moving on to throwing water bottles, notebooks, and the remote across the room, flushing out every bit of anger in the moment.
“FOR GOD’S FUCKING SAKE JAI, CAN YOU PLEASE BE RESPONSIBLE FOR ONCE” exclaimed Maya.
“I know… I know… damn… I get it. It’s not like you say anything new anyways.”
“Well, I’m sure you have common sense to figure that out if you have any” responded Maya.
Jai angrily turned away and slammed the door in front of her face. After the fight had simmered, he would then try to win her back by hosting a flash mob at the college canteen and blasting their favorite Michael Jackson song “Remember the Time” outside her window in the middle of the night. Maya couldn’t be mad for long and couldn’t ignore his “apology”; she loved him deeply, even after finding out he’s in stage two liver cancer.
When Jai realized he couldn’t join the Army, he was devasted. He couldn’t stay sober; the thought of himself not being able to prove something of himself to his parents, especially his dad slowly numbed him, starting from his feet and then tingling his nerves up to his brain. He had played out in his mind what would his father say after finding out about his failure.
“Is this what we have taught him? Irresponsible fellow. Did he not see this coming? Tell me Sarita, have we not told him countless times what his drinking behavior will do to him. This was bound to happen; any children not willing to obey and respect his/her parents will surely be punished.”
His father was hard on him for his failure in keeping up with the Indian family values while his mother endured the blame. Everything he did growing up was criticized and had consequences. He believed he had failed himself. Every other week, after his drinking tantrums, Maya drove to his place and helped his mom put him to bed. She took off any accessories and heavy clothing, and tucked him in. She laid out his work clothes for the next morning and just before she left, she placed an aspirin tablet and a note that had something inspirational written on it. Anything she would do to help him get through another day; even a half a smile on his face reading that note would mean a lot for her. Days became weeks, weeks became months and months became years and Jai’s conditions had improved significantly. He was somewhat the same as he was in college, but at least he had some control over his drinking habits. One day, after a long day at an amusement park, he kneeled and proposed to her and Maya accepted. Before she knew it, it was their wedding day. She would never forget that day. That day when she saw the glow on Jai’s face, freely dancing and how happy he was. Only him, everyone else was a blur. That day when she realized she’s bound to him for seven lifetimes.
Jai and Maya’s life after marriage was extremely difficult. After facing three miscarriages, they began to see more bad in life than the good. Their love wasn’t the same. Naina knew their love had lost a little bit of strength, seeing the frequent crimson red stains on the sink, the little clumps of hair on the bathtub, the crying, and the heartaches. Nonetheless, they kept trying. One spontaneous evening, Maya felt the urge to take a pregnancy test. She grabbed her keys and headed to the nearest drugstore. She took the test and she felt numb for a moment. She paced back and forth the living room and looked at the results again for the eighth time. A shadow of fear and doubt crept over her for a few minutes; she knew she couldn’t bear a fourth miscarriage. Suddenly, she heard the doors unlock and when she rushed over to greet Jai, she felt differently again. This time she felt a sense of confidence and had told Jai, “I think this time’s going to be different.”
Nine months after, Maya became a mother on May 28th. It was a day when a life was given, and a life was lost. The baby’s green tinted hazel eyes glistened under the sunlight that peaked through the gap of the curtains. The mother and her daughter locked eyes, and a surge of dopamine rejuvenated her worn out body. It was the first time she could breathe properly. She wasn’t alone. Maya vowed to provide the best life for Naina. She knew it wouldn’t be an easy life to pay for all the expenses and working at the same time while losing sleep time, but she was living for a different kind of hope.
Days became weeks, weeks became months, months became years, and the child grew up with lots of love and every want fulfilled. If she wanted an American Girl doll, the mother would buy it, if she wanted to buy books and accessories at her school’s Scholastic book fair, her mother would give her some money. If she wanted to sleepover at her friend’s house, her mother would let her go. The money was tight, but the mother wanted to let Naina live her best life. Maya knew better; she had to overcome her fears as a mother and broaden her mindset a little although Naina wasn’t exactly the definition of a “good” kid. She was spoiled of course. In the first grade, she pinched a girl’s arm so hard that it bruised, and the girl’s mom almost sued. Maya had nearly bursted into tears in the principal’s office. She had gotten suspended twice in middle school for vandalizing school property. In high school, Naina’s friend circle were mainly boys. She told her mom she had a hard time fitting in with girls.
“Mom, they’re so dramatic and all senti…Ok, I’m like that too but minus the senti part. It’s not just the same ok,” with her eyes rolled.
Naina’s cheeks had turn rosy pink.
“Plus, guys are fun to talk to. They’re so funny and are always the class clowns. And I like class clowns.”
In her junior year, she took up a job at a local super market to lend a helping hand for her mom. She had seen those late-night frustrations at the stacks of mails that were screaming “PAYMENT DUE” and “PAYMENT OVERDUE.” Maya felt immense love for Naina for supporting her. She even felt a little guilty that her baby was working while being a full-time student. She even thought of working two jobs so that Naina wouldn’t have to. One evening, Maya went to their room to drop a mail off when her eyes diverted to a piece paper sticking out of a drawer. She was curious to know why this paper had been shoved in hurriedly.
“It doesn’t hurt to take a peek at it…” said Maya to herself.
She took the paper out and it was an interest flyer for the military. Startled and confused, Maya called Naina.
“Yeah, what’s up?”
“What’s this all about?”
“Mom… what… why?” Naina questioned annoyingly.
“Can you please explain?”
“Okay, um… I know you told me to not hide anything. But the thing is that I don’t think I want to be an astronaut anymore. A couple of my guy friends were talking about joining the military and I sort of stuck around for a while and I got hooked. In class, we had a sergeant over and he talked about what’s it like to be a solider and stuff and that got me even more hooked. I bunked 1st and 2nd period today just to some military training with my friends. I didn’t know how to tell you this because I thought you would get mad or something.”
Maya paused for a moment. A flashback of Jai dancing on their wedding day appeared in her head.
“Look, if you’re passionate about this, then I can’t tell you not to go for it. This is your dream and only you can achieve this. As a mother and a believer, I’ll support you.”
With a sigh of relief, Naina replied, “I love you, thank you mom.”
Maya rushed to her room and locked the door. She started to sweat profusely. Her tongue became dry and her limbs weak. Hot tears rolled down her face. She took the picture frame from the nightstand and hugged it tightly.
“I miss you so much, you have no idea. Our little girl is all grown up now. She wants to be what you dreamed of, isn’t that great? I’m really scared, but I’m really hopeful. I know she’ll make you proud.”
The next morning, Maya felt extra and left an inspirational note for Naina and a KitKat bar with it. She felt good and knew this time’s going to be different. In Naina’s final year of high school, her mother was all arms and ears for whatever Naina had to do, whether if it was filling out paperwork or just listening to her plans and aspirations. Watching Naina grow from the very start into a strong independent woman because of Maya’s love and support was her biggest accomplishment even if she failed trying to change Jai.
A day before Naina left for bootcamp, Maya wanted to tell her daughter a little bit about her father and so the mother and her daughter went out for the daily evening walk.
“Naina, when you first told me you wanted to join the military, honestly I was shocked. Partly because I thought it was a little unusual but more importantly, I thought I saw a reflection of your father in your eyes… I never told you this but fun fact, your father’s biggest dream was to join the military.”
“I’m actually surprised at myself. I never had thought about the military before but these past few days, I feel like I’m on the right track. And now that I know dad wanted to join the army, I know I can’t go wrong. I feel like he’s with us right now”, as Naina turned to her left side.
“He would be so proud of you.”
Naina smiled and said, “now I have a stronger reason of fulfilling my dream.”
The mother and daughter exchanged half hugs and finished up their walk.
“You ready to go?” Maya asked.
“Yup, just me, myself and I, akekeke, Naina chortled.
“Take care of yourself. I love you.” Maya’s voice faltered trying to hide her ugly crying face.
“Aww mom, come here. I’ll be back home in no time! Gimme your phone, let’s take a quick selfie!”
A few years had passed by since that day. Naina had left home to North Carolina for her training. Maya kept up with her normal life; work, cook dinner, clean, sleep. Every night before she went to bed, she had two pictures side by side together. The selfie she took with Naina before she left for bootcamp and a picture frame of Naina’s graduation. There she was in the angelic white and navy, peaked cap on her head and the dark navy suit with gold buttons stitched strictly down, and the red strips that outlined her suit. She fulfilled her father’s dream. She did it.
First draft: https://drive.google.com/file/d/19aHiHxKbwixioWySBhE5WIwVJnICDtKG/view?usp=sharing
